Legend has it (and when I say “legend” I mean, “family recollection”) that I convinced our dad to get a Christmas tree (in our non-Christian household) because I expressed an understanding that we didn’t have a tree because we couldn’t afford it. That’s an unacceptable thought in my dad’s mind, that one of his children thought he couldn’t provide for the family. A tree was trimmed. Lights were hung. For the next 20 or so years.
Mission accomplished.
Enter our daughter. She came last week, describing with much enthusiasm her teacher’s plans for rewarding the class for good behavior and outcomes: a Christmas party, wherein the classroom would be lit with lights, there would be treats, it would be fabulous.
I said, I thought lightly, “Well that’s great, we celebrate Hanukkah at home, but yeah, Christmas parties are cool.”
Our daughter couldn’t manage the two opposing forces. Her expression turned dark. I asked what was wrong.
“Well, we don’t celebrate Christmas. I don’t know what I’ll do at the party.”
I reassured her that she could be at any party and enjoy any fun she wanted, that I was only talking about what we did in our house, and blah blah blah… I made no sense to a 7-year-old’s black-and-white, yes-or-no, what-the-heck-does-ecumenical-mean mind.
I promised her we would decorate our home. I promised her I would let her teacher know that she’d like to share Hanukkah traditions at her class party (we’re not sure her teacher knows that she is not a Christmas celebrator, per se).
Our son meanwhile, chimed in, with a desperate tone, “Will Santa come here?”
I promised that yes, Santa would come here. I tried to explain that Santa comes everywhere, especially when you have a big family that celebrates Hanukkah (Daddy’s side) and Diwali (Mommy’s side) and Christmas (aunt’s and uncle’s sides).
Our daughter then asked about Kwaanza. I couldn’t elaborate on that one very well, but I concluded that the holidays are a time for love and family and peace and joy and that’s all that mattered. Maybe I told them to brush their teeth and go to bed at that point, I don’t remember.
Today, at our daughter’s insistence, we decorated the outside of the house with lights. Blue lights. Blue for Hanukkah. Our girl asked us when we’d add in the brightly lit animal sculptures and Santas, like some of our neighbors have. I said, “Oh, that’s not really our style.”
Later tonight, we drove through town. Many homes and yards were fully decorated. We ooohed and aaaahed. We arrived back home, to see our dark blue icicle LED lights outlining our roofline, as well as casting some pretty rockin’ reflections on our home, little blue orbs all over the place… very Disco. I love it.
Our girl noted, “I think I like these blue lights. Nobody else has them.”
And at about the same time she was uttering these words, I received a text from a neighbor, whose son told her, “I love those! Can we have blue lights even though we’re not Jewish?”
Happy trimming, lighting, and loving, all of you out there.
We don’t do lights but maybe we will now. Blue ones, just for you. 🙂 I also have to mention that when I taught at a school that wasn’t all one culture, my class never had a Christmas party. It was the tradition at school to have a party. So my class had a JOY party because every religion includes joy. Lemme at that teacher — I’ll give her some good ideas. 😀
I’ve led dreidel parties in our daughter’s class the past two years… only because I told the teacher that we celebrated Hanukkah. I haven’t done that yet this year. As soon as I do, I’m certain the teacher will be more than accommodating!